Asrai Devin- the Maven of Mischief

Putting the fun back in dysfunctional.

Tag Archives: Health

Diva Cup


Well, warning to anyone who doesn’t want to read about the dirty details of my menstrual cycle, here are some other things you might be interested in.

Somewhat funny, mostly truthful review of FSOG.

I was looking for visual inspiration for my hero (who is a red head) and I fell in love just a little with this picture. (Eddie Redmayne)

And I’m also in love with Damian Lewis who played Major/LT Winters in Band of Brothers.

He is exactly my Gabriel in my book. And I’ve been totally distracted for what I was going to write about.

So, I’ve wanted a Diva Cup for like forever. I needed to order some supplements, which I do mostly from and I wanted to buy more than just one thing, so I was shopping around and decided, what the hell, I added the Diva Cup.

It’s intimidating when I first got it and the first several times of inserting it, especially getting the twist done properly so it opens.

Best period I”ve ever had. I’ve been a mostly pad girl for ages. I use cloth ones and the occasional sea sponge. But I’ve never really been happy with any method, it always felt unclean and squidy. And I’m really lazy. The Diva Cup can be worn for up to 12 hours, two to four washings a day and we are good to go.

so, there you go. That is your dose of too much information from Asrai this week.


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Rich people suck

Rich people are easy to hate. We love to watch them on TV a la “Real Housewives”, the Bachelor, every reality show with a celebrity and every entertainment “news” show, like TMZ or E! Now.

We can watch these rich people who have the most screwed up lives you could imagine. And we can say “man, I’m glad I’m not rich, because being rich makes you have a messed up life. I’d rather be just making it and be a normal person, without all that drama going on around me. I make good life choices. And I’m a nice person. Rich people are not nice people.

When you set yourself thoughts about rich people, you have an internal number that makes people rich. An annual salary it is okay to make, a net worth it is okay to possess.

You set limits on your own prosperity with your thoughts.

It’s not just the money we set limits on. We set limits on our happiness. When we reach our internal limit of good things, we create something bad, we pick a fight or get careless and cause injury so we can bring ourself down to a place where we feel safe and happy. Gay and Kathy Hendrick’s call it the Upper Limit Problem.

When you run into the upper limit problem, you can let yourself bring your success down a few notches until you feel balanced again. Or you can fight it.

You look at what is behind your feelings and thoughts. Where did they start? Who gave you the idea? In this case, who gave you the idea that rich people suck? Parents and early experiences are often where our beliefs about the big stuff, money, relationships and work come from. According to the Hendricks, whose work I recommend you read if you are interested in digging further, anyway, according to Gay and Kathy, all our relationships are reflections of our early experiences. We actually behave in ways that get the world around us to make us feel like we did when we were four, because it’s safe there, we know how to feel and act there.

I know, it’s a little radical. Who wants to feel like they are four or five or ten again? But I have found it is very true. Just when we start go get ahead and feel like we are saving money, work slows down and hours are cut for a while and we have to spend our savings to pay bills.

The last part of the rich people suck is, choose differently. You can the first person to make a ton of money and not use it to avoid paying taxes you. You can pay your taxes and laugh at them. You can spend some of it sponsoring programs in Third World Countries. You can start a scholarship for things you wish there were a scholarship for. You can do whatever you want with your money. You can let it empower you. You can be an example.

What are you going to choose to do?

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The difference between:

This is all I get for the rest of my life?


I get all this for the rest of my life!

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Acts of Self-Forgiveness

When I was fifteen my parents split up. Finally.

That September, my dad took my brother and I to one of those crash em amateur car races. It was a cold day, and the cold got into my bones and made my knees and elbows ache.

The pain didn’t subside for ten years.

They tested me for arthritis. I exercised, I relaxed, I did heat, I did cold. Yoga helped a great deal, but only for a few hours. I only took pain killers on really bad days.

So how did I get rid of the pain?

Self-forgiveness and self-acceptance.

*takes a deep breath*

I used to self-harm. I didn’t know how to deal with stress or negative emotions. I didn’t fit in at my high school. I didn’t like myself.

I had to forgive myself for a lot of injury I did to myself. I had to accept that I had done the best I could. I had to learn how to deal with my emotions (this is a work in progress).

I decided today I want to make some art work for the wall that says “This life is a work in progress.” Because I feel like I am just reaching my grown up stage. At age 30, it’s all coming together for me.

What age did you feel like you’d become a grown up? What parts of your life feel like a work in progress?


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#Row80 Checkin January 25

This week in the life of Asrai: husband got a truck loan, so I get to drive the new truck, because he’s selling the old truck and neither of us feel safe with the kids in the micro-car. It’s a Kia Rio.

I finished Dragon Ages: Origins and become Queen!! of Ferelden. I <3 Alistair.  I need to stay away from fan fiction involving Alistair or Bann Teagan. It’s romantic word-crack.

And my son wound up with a chest infection and on antibiotics and now I have a cough. So, I’m whiney. On with the goals.

Writing goals:

Edit 5 days a week, 1 hour a day  After editing is done, write 250 words 5 days a week or 1250 words per week.

I’m not even tracking the hour anymore. But I am beginning to hate the book I was editing so I decided it was time for beta readers and I’ll go onto the next book. I haven’t looked at it since October.


Get outside 5 days a week.

Since we are all dying, we walk to and from school because it’s super close and it’s super warm this week. (Yeah thanks weather and furnace, couldn’t have gone out THIS week).

Exercise with EA active 4 times per week

I’m several work-outs behind. See above whining for why I’ve fallen behind.

Plan meals (gotta get our budget under control).

All meals planned for this week. Sweet.

Read one book and watch one movie a week as per the fifty-fifty challenge.

Almost done Carly Philips book “Kiss Me If You Can“. Not sure if I’ll do a fiction or non-fiction next. I’m trying to alternate but I’m reading this one and Indie Journey at the same time. I guess it should be a fiction I start next since I started the fiction one first … okay I’m babbling.

Go to bed by 11 PM

It’s 11:30 right now, so I’m not making it today. I’ve been playing with pintrest and Goodreads (applying for the author program).

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#Row80 Checkin January 22

I’m changing my goals this week. I’ve realized somethings I set are not working for me, and since they are my goals I’m changing them. I felt better immediately after I decided to do so earlier in the week.

Writing goals:

Edit 5 days a week, 1 hour a day  After editing is done, write 250 words 5 days a week or 1250 words per week.

I’m barely getting my editing in never mind my writing, so I dropped the writing goal. And I’m dropping the hour goal, as long as I get at least one chapter edited, I’m calling it success. So far I’ve been successful since our furnace came back to life.

The change was to protect my new bedtime of 11 PM, I need to get my son up earlier so bedtime for me has to get earlier.

Blog goals:

More guest posting: both getting and giving. Going to aim for 2 a month for Jan and Feb, one a week for March.

Dumping this goal. I hate reaching out to people. I’m stressed over just keeping up with my blog. So I’m just going to blog, connect via Twitter and do my mash-ups and call it good.

Working out a schedule in a spreadsheet, because I’m a geek.

I want back to this but it’s not really working for me. Maybe when the boy-child is off antibiotics and I’m sleeping at night.


Get outside 5 days a week.

Haha. It was below -20 all week. I had to drive my daughter to school, we live 3 blocks away. There was no recess, buses didn’t run most of the week. And then my son wound up with a chest infection. Someday it will warm up and we won’t be sick. Before we moved to oiltown, we NEVER got sick. Since we got here, we’ve been sick constantly. It might be all the damned wind. I so want to move back to Central Alberta.

Exercise with EA active

I missed one work-out last week. 4 days on, 3 days off. But I’m less excited about exercising, but I have noticed a change in my endurance and muscle strength. I’m not trying to lose weight (I’m sadly underweight) but I have to exercise to stave off Seasonal Affective Disorder.

Plan meals (gotta get our budget under control).

Doing well. Been using up some freezer stuff since I didn’t get to shop on my usual day, Tuesday thanks to furnace-gate.

Read one book and watch one movie a week as per the fifty-fifty challenge.

Lord, I have to get a list of these. I lost my notebook. I had a bunch of late books from the library so I got banned from borrowing E-books as well. But I fixed that. I read “Write Good or Die” edited by Scott Nicholson but it was written before the e-book boom so half of it was related to making pitches, which I skipped. When I finish The Indie Journey, I will count the two of them as one book.

Oh I did finish The Happiness Project.

And I immediately thought “I should start my own project” and then I thought of all the other things I had going on and how crappy I was feeling about not keeping up, and I ditched the idea. I didn’t watch a movie, unless you count the last half hour of  the second Star Wars movie, which was on when I got up the other morning. My husband had fallen asleep on the sofa while watching and it went on repeat. My son was excited to see “bain-bain” or airplanes so early in the day.

Happy birthday to my mom.

Tomorrow I will watch a movie. Not sure what yet, something child-friendly. Or with pretty guys in it.

The other goal I’m adding, which I’m not really tracking, is just keeping my sink shiny again. I’ve been slacking on routines once again after the holidays and illness and furnace-gate. So, I’m doing minimalism and just doing the shiny sink thing, and it’s working. I’m getting dishes done consistently before bed.

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Goals, goals, goals

Leo Babuta from Zen Habits doesn’t believe in them.

But most motivational self-help, life coach gurus will tell you they are necessary.

Cecil Alec Mace was the first to study and document goal setting. It was Edwin A. Locke who developed the goal setting theory we all use today.

If you’ve read any self-help goal setting books you may have seen that goals need to be SMART.

specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-targeted.

I recently was reading through Michael Neil’s blog of coaching tips and I stumbled across a post about our inability to judge how long it will take us to do something (and I submit: or how much effort it will take us).

Once George pointed out this “hidden factor” to me, I began to see it everywhere. Actors who give up on their dreams after not becoming stars in their first 6 months in Hollywood. Coaches who can’t understand why they’re not making 6 figure incomes in their first two years in the business. Employees who aren’t getting promoted on their time schedule and entrepreneurs who think if the world hasn’t beaten a path to their door the day they opened it they must be doing something wrong.

I have also read somewhere or heard him say (but I could not find a link) that people who strive for what they want are more likely to get what they want then people who strive for what they think they can get. Which makes the saying “Reach for the moon, if you miss at least you’ll land amoung the stars,” to be very sage advice.
Reaching your goals  might also depend on why you set them. The Preacher’s Pen warns against setting goals for other people.
People set goals based on someone else’s expectations – Some will set goals based on what others think they should do. There are many people who have lived their life because someone else thought they needed a certain career. For instance, I know people who were told they should be engineers and they are, but everyday the hate their job. They are only there because someone else said it would be good for them. Are the goals you are setting for yourself, your goals?
On the side of goal setting we have Jack Canfield who wrote many of my first self-help motivational books, Dare to Win and Aladdin Factor. He’s also one of the giants behind Chicken Soup for the Soul.
In order to get what you want, you must first decide what you want. Most people really foul up at this crucial first step because they simply can’t see how it’s possible to get what they want — so they don’t even let themselves want it.
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Perfect Mom Monday: Fall cold edition

I don’t know where this cold came from. I was the first to get it, which is strange because I don’t go anywhere.

I tried echinacea and juice and everything, but I’ve given up. I have a cold. this one is going to stick. My only saving grace is my son won’t get it because he’s still nursing.

Moms what do you do when you get sick? Not sick going to die sick, but sick enough that you are tired and don’t want to do all the things you usually get done on a Monday? Do you suck it up and do it anyway? Do you do the bare minimum? Do you

just wait until you feel better and then spend the next 5 days playing catch up?

Think I’m going to go for a combination. Do what I usually do, but over a longer time with long periods of rest in between.

Funny thing I was trying to find a picture of a woman who was ill, and I couldn’t find one. They were all men laying about with hands on their heads or stomachs.

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