Asrai Devin- the Maven of Mischief

Putting the fun back in dysfunctional.

Category Archives: Sex

The way back machine: What is the internet for? NSFW

the internet is for porn.

Old but still FUNNY AS HELL. You were warned!

The only bad things is that that’s now in my youtube history where my son spends far too much time, so now I have to go spend some time watching safe videos so this doesn’t show up tomorrow.

Get excited about your life

This is the culmination of a few things. First, my latest crush obsession with Eddie Redmayne . Second, trying to figure out my next novel, which I’ve started and crashed about three different times. Third, subsequent daydreaming linked to said crush and writing attempts. Fourth, (I keep adding on) my best friend is in the middle of falling in love. She and her boyfriend as just disgustingly cute about it all!! And last, a post by fellow WANA classmate/friend Kristy K. James, Why Can’t Life be Like a A Love Song?

I was having a lovely daydream the other day about a life different from my own. A life where the mundane things weren’t so mundane, where I was just excited about things and my partner.

And then I started thinking about my husband. I don’t want a new partner. I want him, we have future plans together, which is going to be legendary. But, in the meanwhile, we have to live day to day life and it can get boring and we get entrenched in the exhaustion of two kids, jobs, bills, and the constant threat of clutter taking over our lives. (My husband is perfect for me. I’m keeping him).

But the mundane crap is really a drag.

So it hit me. Why not feel excited about the mundane things? Why not do things for him and be happy I’m making him happy, instead of feeling a bit resentful? Why not be more present with him and with our kids? Why not feel more sexy? Why not put on a bit of an effort for him? Why not feel excited when I see him?

Some people might consider it fake or false to force excitement. You can call it fake it til you make it. I don’t think it is false. After a decade, I can’t expect to feel spontaneous excitement and flooding in my lady bits when he walks in the room like when we were first together. Doesn’t mean it would be false to dwell on it and get excited about him.

A lot of people had the wrong idea about how love should feel. I know I had wrong ideas.

I thought for ages it be as Kristy K James says:

Am I way off base here, or are the feelings expressed in this song the samefeelings that most every adult in the world wants to feel? The newness of love? The uncertainty? The hope? The knowledge that this is the one?

Maybe it’s not the wrong idea of how we should feel, but the idea that we should feel that day in and day out without putting out any effort ourselves.

So, bring up the excitement in your life with what you have. Put out an effort to make the people around you feel the way you want to feel, don’t wait for them to make you happy.


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FML: Too much to do


Damn it.

For readers who want more hockey- you are in luck. My brain figured out the next novel. I know it’s YA for everyone. because I get the feeling i”m going to love this one. (I know I say that EVERY TIME).

but at the same time, I have all these other awesome ideas I want to write.

I had this fairytale romance I started writing. It derailed, but I love the idea. The heroine is the daughter of a high ranking noble, set to marry a Prince, whom she’s never met, when she meets his illegitimate half-brother. I’m not sure where it derailed. This was a lesson I did with Holly Lisle‘s How to Think Sideways, I’ll have to pull out my notes and work through it. I love the idea.

I am mostly finished a May-December romance. And now the new hockey novel wants to run that way as well. I’ll try to resist.

I noticed that one thing I love to write about is a rekindled romance from the teenager years.  Maybe I never got over the boys I loved as a teenager. (Also, despite  wishing to write erotica, this last romance I wrote has ONE sex scene and it doesn’t even need to be in the book. I am writing less sex!!)

Back to the May-December, I-loved-you-since-I-was-a-teen that is not quite finished. When I write a novel I do the first draft and then I plot it out and look for holes. I think there may be holes, but now that I wrote the HEA my muse is washing her hands of the project.

I was going to force it a bit more, but I think I shall leave it sit for a few weeks, and I’ll go onto HOCKEY.

While I was looking up hot redheads, I stumbled on some gorgeous pictures of Eddie Redmayne. He’s taken up permanent residence my brain people. I’m sorry that you are tired of hearing about him, I am not tired of thinking about him.

I was trying to work his image into a story, and then my brain managed to morph it into a hockey novel. While you are waiting for that to get onto paper, I am going to release a new Corey Porter story. I forgot about this until I was cleaning up some files. I’ll hopefully run it through the editor and get it out shortly. I think you’ll be surprised. Like Where the Path Leads, it will be free on Smashwords. deets later.

There are a few other projects I’ve abandoned over the last few months, maybe years, that I’d like to see finished. Somedays I wish my brain had an off switch, or I had a nanny. If I had a nanny maybe I could get all this shit done.

Let me know what is up in your life.


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Stalled before I start

I am putting it off. I am waiting for the moment to be right. I am waiting for me to stop being scared. I am waiting for permission. I am waiting for my muse. I am waiting for a good night’s sleep and a day where my son isn’t whiny.

I am waiting to start my next novel.

I’ve got the basic pre-plan on file. And then i just write, but I haven’t started.

I think because I am not excited about this one yet. I want to write it, the hero needs a chance to redeem himself. And yet, I want to write about sexy encounters on the beach with men with freckles who kiss like a fantasy.

I want to write about heroines who think they might like to be literally tied down. And spanked for fun. Heroines who appreciate dominate men who have strict rules about behavior and decorum. And dress. And sex. Of limits tested and stretched further than you thought you could go.

I want to write about falling for the wrong person at the right time, or the right person at the wrong time. I want to write about taboo seductions and clandestine relationships that walk the fine line of hot and just plain wrong. (Nothing illegal this has been something I’ve wanted to write for years).

I want kisses and bodies brushing together, moaning and panting breath that meet between two bodies, mouths that suck and tease, fingers that caress and stroke and orgasms for everyone.  And people who roll over and say “I love you” even though they’ve only been dating for five days.

I want love at first sight and happily every afters forever more.

Maybe I should write those things instead. I think the muse and I will be much happier. I will come back to the hockey later. I’m still mad at the hero for his past.

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Stats junkie (TMI editioN)



So, I wrote about 50 Shades and caning versus Canning and it got me a gazillion hits. And 3 comments. So thanks for that. But those page views and site hits are starting to dwindle and I’m feeling like I need a infusion of stats. I am no longer happy with 10 page views a day, I want a hundred.

I could write about all the 50 Shades of Gray “copy cats” or follow-ups being served for the masses. I feel sorry for author’s who get promoted as “if you loved FSOG, you’ll love this as well”.

I could write about the women who attempted to have FSOG lingerie parties, but received a cease and desist letter from James. But you could Google it yourself and boggle over a woman who published Fan fic telling people they can’t use her idea either. (Besides, I didn’t think titles could be copyrighted. At least in the US it cannot, but it can be trademarked, but FSOG has not yet? If they are pursuing it, does that mean it can’t be used by someone else?)

I think if could get those topless photos of Kate Middleton that would garner me a few hits, but they were destroyed I’d believe and Ii I was going to post photos of naked anyone, I would want the model to give consent. And the only person I’d be willing to ask is myself and I really have no qualms about it except my husband’s objections. I’m still nursing so half the population of the small city we live in has seen them in the past year. He’s always pulling them out for me to show off or unlatching and running away before I can pull up my shirt.

What do you think would “asrai topless” gain me more hits? I’ll add it to my tags and let you know if it does.

I’ve been looking on Amazon at some books I’d like to own for reference and every time I’m still shocked by Kindle prices being significantly higher than the paperback. It pisses me off actually and some of the time I’m tempted to not buy any copy of the book. I know it’s like not seeing a movie because of something the actor did in real life. No one is going to feel me not buying it, other people will and my silent protest, means NOTHING to anyone.

And the last thing? DO you have a belly bulge? That lower belly pooch. It may be from tight hip flexors are. and according to Pinterest, there is an easy way to combat the issue.

From ovulation to menstrual bleeding, my hips shift to a bad place, they feel “out” of place and my entire body suffers. My family suffers, I am crabby and whiny (oh I whine A LOT). Right now my neck is sore on the right side and my shoulder is on the left (I did the above exercise but it made my shoulder hurt).

And last, but very not least, happy birthday to my favorite 10 year old.

If you have any ideas for how I can feed my need for hits, other than writing useful content, let me know in the comments.


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Shades of Enjoyment

So I’m nearly done the first book of the Fifty Shades Trilogy.

I like the story. The base story, is good. Boy meets girl, boy likes to tie girl up, girl resists her own sexuality and enjoyment. Some of the discussions after a “scene” are great. Ana’s confusion over her feelings regarding being spanked for the first time. She enjoyed it, but that confuses her. Christian encourages her to enjoy it and just try to sit with her feelings. All good stuff.

Ana annoys the living shit out of me. Her inner goddess and subconscious talk to her so much, I’d swear she has multiple personalities. Her inner goddess is a crazy bitch, by the way, doing the meringue with salsa steps and then a cheer leading outfit with pom poms. And her subconscious is a judgemental bitch. Calling her a ho and a hooker for accepting a car, a computer and clothing. It’s distracting me.

If Christian talks one more time about her biting her lip, I might delete the book. WTF? I know he’s some kink master of the business world, but seriously, how hot can it be? Why does it have to come up every five pages? The book is very repetitive. The lips, his mercurial moods, her worrying about how Christian might react to her speaking with a male. I know it’s supposed to make him look extremely possessive, but he just looks like an ass. No one wants to be with an insecure partner like that. I know, I’ve been that insecure. You just wind up making your partner really unhappy and ultimatly yourself. Maybe this is why none of the fifteen have stuck around?

And I dunno, how does he have this much free time on his hands if he has that much money? Doesn’t he have like a hundred companies to oversee? Shouldn’t he spend a little more time at that? I know CEOs make an obsecne amount of money, but I think they also read an obscene amount of reports and tell lots of people what to do. Instead he flies on a whim to see Ana while she is visiting her mother (which she asked him not to do, ass) and then buys the company she works for.

The sex is so-so. The build up is sad. Heat and/or dampness grows in her belly or down there, which I take to mean her knees.

The other thing I don’t get is why Christian doesn’t warm her up to S&M. She’s a virgin, never dated anyone  and certainly never been tied up and spanked. He’s a really crappy Dom if he thinks the best way to secure her is to go full out crazy S&M on her ass (literally). Introduce her slowly to the ideas and the rules, and then once she knows what is going on THEN give her the contract. Not hand her the contract, a laptop and say “research this online”. The Internet is full of crappy advice and half-truth and a lot of opinion.

Story good. BDSM has it’s moments and I like the idea. Characters; annoying as hell. Which stands to reason, they were based on Bella and Edward, who annoyed me as well. For the most part, it does not live up to the hype.

Are you or have you read 50 Shades of Grey? What did you like? What did you dislike? What did you love? Did it turn you into a blushing, damp eighteen year old?

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On a list of things we aren’t supposed to discuss, sex is pretty high up there.

Usually we have the idea that the Puritans were against sex, as were they against sex in the Victorian Ages.

Turns out both cultures were into sex. I’ll link to the article about it, but I found other evidence if you google “Puritans and sex” you can find out yourself. Basically, Victorians liked their porn and Puritans were all for sex between married couples and Jesus. And even then they didn’t stick to the rules. There was a lot of impromptu weddings because someone got knocked up.

A lot of people do have a lot of issues surrounding sex.

For a lot of people, sex is related to power.

Long standing is the “joke” of women withholding sex to get what they want from a man. Men are supposed to want sex all the time and always be thinking about it. Women aren’t supposed to want sex, sometimes even enjoy it.

Abuse and rape is all about power. The abuser has power over the victim. Part of becoming a survivor is reclaiming that stolen power.

I digress.

Sex is also a tender subject between partners. What if your partner thinks you are weird? What if they laugh? What if they reject you? What if your partner wants to fulfill your every fantasy?

Do you have hang-ups around talking about sex? Any reasons why you’d like to disclose?

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