Shades of Enjoyment

So I’m nearly done the first book of the Fifty Shades Trilogy.

I like the story. The base story, is good. Boy meets girl, boy likes to tie girl up, girl resists her own sexuality and enjoyment. Some of the discussions after a “scene” are great. Ana’s confusion over her feelings regarding being spanked for the first time. She enjoyed it, but that confuses her. Christian encourages her to enjoy it and just try to sit with her feelings. All good stuff.

Ana annoys the living shit out of me. Her inner goddess and subconscious talk to her so much, I’d swear she has multiple personalities. Her inner goddess is a crazy bitch, by the way, doing the meringue with salsa steps and then a cheer leading outfit with pom poms. And her subconscious is a judgemental bitch. Calling her a ho and a hooker for accepting a car, a computer and clothing. It’s distracting me.

If Christian talks one more time about her biting her lip, I might delete the book. WTF? I know he’s some kink master of the business world, but seriously, how hot can it be? Why does it have to come up every five pages? The book is very repetitive. The lips, his mercurial moods, her worrying about how Christian might react to her speaking with a male. I know it’s supposed to make him look extremely possessive, but he just looks like an ass. No one wants to be with an insecure partner like that. I know, I’ve been that insecure. You just wind up making your partner really unhappy and ultimatly yourself. Maybe this is why none of the fifteen have stuck around?

And I dunno, how does he have this much free time on his hands if he has that much money? Doesn’t he have like a hundred companies to oversee? Shouldn’t he spend a little more time at that? I know CEOs make an obsecne amount of money, but I think they also read an obscene amount of reports and tell lots of people what to do. Instead he flies on a whim to see Ana while she is visiting her mother (which she asked him not to do, ass) and then buys the company she works for.

The sex is so-so. The build up is sad. Heat and/or dampness grows in her belly or down there, which I take to mean her knees.

The other thing I don’t get is why Christian doesn’t warm her up to S&M. She’s a virgin, never dated anyone  and certainly never been tied up and spanked. He’s a really crappy Dom if he thinks the best way to secure her is to go full out crazy S&M on her ass (literally). Introduce her slowly to the ideas and the rules, and then once she knows what is going on THEN give her the contract. Not hand her the contract, a laptop and say “research this online”. The Internet is full of crappy advice and half-truth and a lot of opinion.

Story good. BDSM has it’s moments and I like the idea. Characters; annoying as hell. Which stands to reason, they were based on Bella and Edward, who annoyed me as well. For the most part, it does not live up to the hype.

Are you or have you read 50 Shades of Grey? What did you like? What did you dislike? What did you love? Did it turn you into a blushing, damp eighteen year old?

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6 thoughts on “Shades of Enjoyment

  1. ‘Down there’ means her knees! Ohmygawd, you slay me. I was ready to slap that inner goddess bitch by the end of book one. Just a fair warning, you’re NOT done with the lip biting. Not by a long shot. Just skim it, that’s what I did. And the inner goddess/subconscious conversations. I mean, when her inner goddess did a victory lap like an ice skater (or something ridiculous like that), I rolled my eyes inwardly at myself. ;) For those of you who haven’t read the books, I’m being silly with that last line ~ it’s actually in the book. I did try it once, to roll my eyes inwardly at myself. Almost ended up in hospital.

    I completely agree with you on all points. The only redemption I found was the last chapter told in Christian’s POV. You’re not there yet, so maybe this will give you something to look forward to. I loved knowing Christian’s thoughts. I’ve heard a rumor she’s releasing a new book from his POV. Not sure I’ll buy it. I’m pretty much over my Christian obsession.

    • Don’t roll your eyes at me! I will punish you. Or maybe you’ve had your punishment by trying to roll them inwardly. I ended up skimming a lot because nothing was adding to the plot.

      The very last chapter or the last chapter of the first book? I got about 20% in the last book when my two week borrow ran out.

      Maybe I couldn’t love Christian the way he was meant to be loved because i have 2!! nephews named Christian.

      • I bet your two Christians are WAY better behaved than Mr. Grey.

        The last chapter of book 3. It was a re-telling of chapter one of the first book, but in Christian’s POV. Did that make any sense at all? ;)

        • Oh okyay that does make sense. I think I have a freind whom I am going to borrow it from. After she reads it again.

  2. great post, Asrai. I haven’t read it yet and probably won’t given this post. a book takes off and then we all buy it to see what it’s about. this time I’m resisting making it a bigger hit than it was. LOL

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